Coming to terms with the changes

This is written FRIDAY, September 10, 2010 when I get to read again my previous "ON THAT BENCH" article simply out of mere boredom & ; loneliness.

Okay. Roughly three months ago, before classes opened, my brain was into a lot of imagining how going into college would turn out. I didn't have any idea to what college life would hurl at me, either sweet cotton candies directly on my salivating mouth or rough, hard stones aimed at my forehead. I didn't know. And it sent me that peculiar shiver down my spines. I was afraid of the unknown. I was afraid of COLLEGE!

Don't get me wrong. I am not saying now that COLLEGE is not that frightening and difficult afterall. With all honesty, college still terrifies me (in a major, major way!) and still gives me random moments when I could just pause and all of a sudden say: "samuk! lisura pud aning college uy! maypang high school sauna."

Well, it still is September afterall, barely 3 months since I first set foot on college's groounds. I still don't have any right to tell whether college is the COTTON CANDY or the HARD STONE that would hit any newbie here in college. But one thing is for sure: everything here in college is just the result of one's OWN determination and will. You actually reap what you sow, unlike in HS when everything seemed to be plainly spoon-fed (But I so love HS. I miss HS! huhuhu).

About coping up with college?! NOT EASY! You'd ask me now if I'm already fully-adjusted to it? LOL. I still certainly have a lot of "adjustments" to do other than the nosebleed-inducing adjustments we're making in accounting. Diverse people, demanding subjects, new teachers with *nakaka-OMG!* approach of teaching, very limited resource (specifically kanang KWARTA!) and how to budget allowance, paying visit to my hometown every weekends, totally boring life in the boarding house, housekeeping and stuffs--all of these and more are just part of my adjustments-to-do list! And so far, I think I'm bit by bit doing it with success (roll-eyes) !

About my grades?! Hmmm. Shaky, yet so far, I'm doing good! 'B' is my lowest letter grade in my midterm grades (accounting, of course, samok nga subject uy! hehehe). I just pray that everything would go smooth-sailing for the next weeks, months, and years until.... you know na!

About missing high school? Indeed the most difficult! Uhm (teary-eyed), I just keep on reminiscing the past, on excavating memories, on resurfacing the youthfulness of my HS life, and keep on praying, for I know that a time will come when the PAST would eventually just become a blurred vision in our memories. And I don't want that to happen. I'm keeping my fingers crossed: I want everyone to stay in my memory, to remember them as if it was just like yesterday. I miss the ISATONiX & my other former high school classmates; my teachers and mentors; the school guards and the frequent squabbles with them; the Mondays/Fridays flag ceremonies and Maam Chico's motherly rantings; the CATs' snappy commands and the elements' as-if-I-care response; Pogi's tempuras, fish balls, manggang hilaw and his wife; the quarterly settlement of clearances including proper haircut check-ups; the foodstuffs sold in the canteen; the many attempted ghost-huntings; the benches; the habitual chitchats, gossiping, teasing, fighting, cleaning (or maybe later), running, playing, giggling, dancing, singing, laughing, and more laughing plus more laughing ending up to more laughing --- I just miss 'em all! As in MAJOR MAJOR missing 'em all!

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Anyways (still teary-eyed), in my three-month long college life, a lot has changed. I'm around good people here in college. Although they still intimidate me, I somehow could manage to squeeze through my wild, noisy block, block ACA! I was at first timid whenever I'm with the group knowing that we're only about five people who came from 'Nat'l High Schools', with the rest coming from semi-private or private schools (but then, who cares?). I'm also happy to befriend some XUHSians and other private-school-groomed students whom I initially thought were "maarte and all" but contrarily proved to be friendly and happy to be with! The teachers as well are nice. However, I don't know if I'd ever find a liking to our thick, unfriendly books (especially BIOLOGY)! Whoah!

Everything is just so unpredictable here. Life just go and continue under the sun with so many surprises. Personally, I'm still endeavoring to seek for them, for the surprises that could be beneficially life-changing. And in the process, I am overwhelmingly humbled and thankful for everything that has been endowed with me by the Almighty. With a thinking like this, I'll always be eager and braced up, not just to face life, but also to live life!

Ad majorem dei gloriam!

***

P.S. #1: I hope you find my writing improved! Hehehehe.We keep on writing compositions, essays and the like in our English class. =)

P.S. #2: It's utterly funny to think how long it took me just coming to terms with the changes. "KOLEHIYO NA MAN DIAY KO! LOL!" =)