My New Year 2017 resolutions

Out of sheer randomness, I tried to revisit my old, shabby blog today only to discover that the last blog entry I posted was exactly a year ago. Wow. Has it really been that long already? I got my hands so full with work this 2016 that I haven’t had the chance to update my blog and squeeze out the creative juices of my brain. 2016 also paved way to a more outdoorsy me which needless to say, had brought me (during most of my non-working hours) to the outdoors than to the coziness of my bedroom at home. In short, I just didn’t have the time to really sit down, lay things out, and do a proper blog entry although honestly, I had several attempts to do so such as when I would want to make an itinerary of our recent climb, or share a recent domestic trip, or just randomly whine over work, or be poetic over the “supermoon” last November. Believe me, I really wanted to go back into writing. I just didn’t have the impeccable timing to match.

Enough with the babbling. Haha. My point in writing this entry is to share and document (‘coz memory is one treacherous friend y’all) my own set of what we all earnestly vow at the start of the new year: New Year’s resolutions.

But first, what do we really mean by a New Year’s resolution? Merriam-Webster defines a New Year’s resolution as “a promise to do something differently in the new year.” In addition, Wikipedia tries to define it as “a tradition in which a person resolves to change an undesired trait or behavior.” My point here being is that some people oftentimes confuse a resolution with goal-setting (though your resolution can be a goal in itself.. but you get my point. Haha).

 So here goes my own list of New Year’s resolutions which fingers-crossed, I hope to fulfill in 2017:

1. To take physical fitness more seriously

I’m turning 23 this year and I could only hope things are not yet too late to engage into a healthier and a more active lifestyle. For the most part of my existence so far, I really didn’t mind taking care of my health thinking that I’m still too young to consider it as a serious matter. In 2017, I promise to improve my physical fitness through ensuring that I eat a proper diet and that I engage into physical activities more often that will promote a fitter physique. I’m not into sports and I’m not changing that. LOL. But I promise to at least make a jogging routine. Mountain climbing will still be part of the list. And oh, I hope I could also enroll in gym classes this year (not for muscle build-up though haha but simply for maintaining a fit body). To eat more veggies is also part of the plan.

2. To improve savings

Every working young professional really finds it hard to save. Or is it just me struggling on this? Haha. Here’s the thing: not all accountants (like myself) know how to handle their own money, but they do know how to count and keep the resources of others. Haha. In 2017, I will continue doing the budget scheme I started in 2016. I will try to tighten my spending, promise not to be an impulsive buyer, and carefully plan and think my purchases through before any cash outlay. Budget on domestic and international travels will have to undergo thorough planning and budget will have to come from my travel fund. Not only should savings markedly increase in 2017, but the discipline of it should be solidified even more.

3. To learn to say “no” when needed

When it does not promote your growth in any way, or when it will only waste your time and money, or when it will not open your eyes to new experiences and learnings, or will not in any way make you feel alive, learn to say “no” to this kind of things. There will come a point in your life when you will prefer staying at home and having family and “me” time than spending the waning hours of your day in parties and other forms of leisure. Take it from a 22-year old. Haha. Kidding. Maybe this is just me and my introvert self, who knows? However, never decline an opportunity that will help you get reconnected and rekindle old friendships no matter how brief or rushed the appointment is. In life, you gotta stay connected somehow to the people who have helped you reach where you are right now.

4. To read the bible more often

I won’t be a hypocrite here and say I’m as religious as how a Catholic should be. Don’t get me wrong: I do believe in a greater God who is the source of everything. If anything, what I only want is for me to personally do something to increase my faith in God. In 2016, I bought my personal bible because there was a point that I felt I needed to. Sadly, for the most part of 2016, it just remained in its box. In 2017, I’m making sure to read and hear more of the Word.

5. To write more frequently as possible

Some people wonder why I put lengthy captions in my IG posts. Haha. Actually, I aspired at one point to make my Instagram feed as sort of a photo blog ‘in lieu’ of the actual blog that I keep. Here’s what I believe: after a long time and I suddenly find the need to travel back down to memory lane through my IG feed, I want to see not just photos—I want to remember the emotions and the feels which the photos tried to capture. And as I believe that memory is one treacherous friend, I want to remember as much as I could through the narrations (captions) of the photos. Haha. Anyway, that’s just me and my kaartehan. Haha. In 2017, I will strive to journalize in my blog the memories I will be creating in 2017, the good and the bad alike, the ups and the downs. Unlike previous years, I won’t wait for the year-end to recall everything that has transpired during the year. I will definitely write more this 2017.

***

Making New Year’s resolutions is indeed an opportunity to evaluate and reflect about the recent year that passed. It does not only have a prospective nature, but retrospective as well, because clearly, you cannot attempt to resolve or change something unless you figure out first what has gone wrong in 2016. It takes self-awareness and the ability to admit the things that needed fixing, and ultimately, it takes tenacity to confront change and to set things right in the new year that has come. If anything, New Year offers us not a new life, but an opportunity to make the old one better.

Happy New Year everyone! What's your new year resolutions? 

2015 in review: Making moments matter

Year 2015 has finally closed its curtains—another year has gone by almost unnoticeably and looking back, I can't help but feel a little emotional for recalling the countless memories I’ve made this year, for the new people I had the good fortune of meeting, for the friends whom I had known better and had bonded with, for the thrilling ‘firsts’ I boldly tried out, for the beautiful places my feet brought me to. Simply worded, I can’t help but acknowledge that bittersweet sensation of the riveting idea of one year finally ending and of a new one blossoming right in our midst. Indeed, New Year truly has the knack of putting one in a contemplative and melodramatic mood so much so that it led me to writing this: a recollection of fond memories through a compilation of random photos I managed to scour within my phone files and Facebook account. Let’s begin the review of year 2015, shall we?

This was one of our random lunch-outs with colleagues (from left to right: Arvin, Ate Pau, Ate Haydee, Tania, RC, Karl, Kevin, Me, Glenn) during our P&G (Procter & Gamble) engagement days. Our P&G fieldwork lasted for about 4 to 5 months wherein we were basically stationed at P&G Headquarter in Makati. With a total of roughly 100 staff, I was grateful to have been part of the said engagement and to have met new friends and worked with fellow Deloittees. One thing I couldn’t forget about this client is their incredibly fast (yes, strongest I’ve seen in my life) internet connection!

This year I started taking a liking to mountain climbing so much so that I was able to climb a total of 3 mountains by the end of the year. The photo above was my second climb at Pico de Loro in Cavite last September. I was with two of my college friends, Gladys (leftmost) and Janelle (rightmost); and two officemates, Tania (in dark blue) and Kath (in pink shorts). The highlight of our trek was climbing the top of the famous “monolith” (the towering rock formation behind us) which we all managed to accomplish successfully.

Everyone that knows me knows that I am a super fan of Ed Sheeran. And last March, I had the amazing experience every Sheerio in the world has ever dreamed of—to watch the ginger himself strum his guitar and spit out his lyrics during his concert. I was with my officemate and frenemy, Alou, who is equally as die-hard on Ed as I am. And to express how exhilarated we were, we even proudly sported our Ed Sheeran shirts that night! When the night was over, I had concluded that it was the best 2 hours of my life!

My batchmates in Deloitte all have that innate wanderlust in them so much so that they have unknowingly infected me with some of it. Last May, even with wobbly finances to back us up, we still managed to sneak our way out of the concrete jungle of BGC and travel to Baler. It was a relaxing experience, one devoid of any thoughts about audit. There was a lot of sight-seeing, eating, joyriding and picture-taking! Some of us even tried out surfing for the first time! Oh how I miss the bunch!

During my stay in Deloitte, I have gotten especially close to Jenica and Ken. Jenica and I have been in the same first engagement while Ken, contrary to most people’s first impression of him, was a big bully. Ken’s family is Mormon (or LDS) and the first time we visited his home in Bataan, Jen and I innocently bought a coffee-flavored cake for his family, which as it later turned out, was a big no-no for Mormons. Personally, I have learned quite a lot about the Mormon faith because of Ken and I was even able to attend their Sunday services twice. And for Jen, we have yet to visit La Union and Baguio when Ken comes back from his 2-year mission in Bacolod! I miss you both!

A group wouldn’t be complete without the “kaladkarin” members. You know, those friends who aren’t necessarily the organizing cause but are almost always present in every “gala,” especially those random, unplanned ones? Glenn is the most high-maintenance and figure-conscious of us, while Taniabelles is the neutral, composed and analytical one. I’ve gotten closer to these two during P&G days—planning for things we know will never happen, and sharing anything under the stratosphere of social media. I miss these two!

This year I also went all-out in manifesting my artsy side by visiting various museums such as Pinto Art Museum, Art in Island and National Museum. Honestly, I’m not really much of an art junkie—I was just dragged by my friends to these “galas”. And to sound even more poetic and artsy, I even attended Juan Miguel Severo’s (yes—that famous slammer in OTWOL) gig just to see him perform live Spoken Poetry. And you know, when surrounded with such Instagrammable spots and atmosphere, one cannot help but unleash his hipster mode and either pretend to be a model or a pro photographer in capturing even the most trivial of things or the most boring of sceneries. Check my IG account (@heraldthestar) for proof of me on hippie mode in such art-inspired places! Haha!

As mentioned above, this year I began getting fond of hiking. And as I was in a hiatus from work at the last quarter of this year, I decided to climb Mt. Kitanglad in my hometown which is the 4^th highest peak in the country. I was with my friend, Tisay, as we paced ourselves up to this gigantic mound of earth. It was breathtaking up there, what with all the sea of clouds and majestic communication towers at the summit. Personally, it was a much-needed isolation from all the daily bustle of life. I got the chance to be one with nature, and reflect on various things. I truly encourage everyone, especially my friends from Bukidnon and CDO, to at least try this one. And to guide you (chos), I’ll be making a separate blog post of my Mt. Kitanglad adventure one of these days.

On the last quarter of 2015, I made the bold decision to leave Deloitte and move back closer to home. Deloitte was my first job after passing the board exam on October 2014 and I was beyond grateful for the opportunity. I’ve gotten firsthand experience of audit and the proverbial “busy season” that comes with the work. I’ve made a lot of friends, been to many places, and enjoyed and struggled like how a typical yuppie—and an auditor at that—would enjoy and struggle. It was indeed an unforgettable phase of my life—a segment that will always sketch a smile on my face whenever I look back. I definitely miss everyone, the work itself, the clients, the office, Mang Ed’s ‘lutong-bahay’, BGC and its always active lifestyle, the traffic, everything. And now that it's fast approaching, I just wish my fellow Deloittees a strong stamina for the upcoming busy season! Hehehe.

-oOo-

Personally, 2015 was a year of self-discovery, of epiphany and of manifesting audacity. It opened my eyes to the many things that lie outside my comfort zones and it has given me fresh perspectives on the different facets of life. 2015 taught me that the smooth-sailing way isn’t necessarily the best way, and that breaking the pattern can make you see things in a different light. Getting restless is the soul’s way of saying that there are still many more things to be explored, discovered, tried, and conquered. I also learned that finding one’s passion in life is the utmost task one could possibly be beset with. The choices we make may seem uncomfortable—and unreasonable even—for others. But life isn’t about pleasing others. It is what you make it, you plan for it, or even what you do not plan for it. It is making moments matter and making decisions that truly, deeply, make you happy.

Happy New Year 2016 everyone! 



Oodles of love,
Herald

Dear crush

Dear crush,

I know this may sound a little creepy but I want you to know that in that very first moment I laid eyes on you—in that gymnasium filled with people hungry to lord over the sportsfest— I instantaneously, undeniably, seriously had this huge crush on you.

It all started in our company sporsfest. It was my first company sportsfest and for the un-athletic person that I am, I wasn’t totally thrilled about the games. Not that I’ve completely scratched “sports” off my vocabulary—it’s just that, I know there are a lot out there who are much better than me in sports. So in my end, why the need to work up myself too much?

We were on the same team. Green—oh, how  I loved green since then (other teams were Violet, Yellow, Red, and Blue). I came a little late in the venue (University of Makati Gymnasium) because the storm outside kept on hammering which added more hassle to the commute. I crabbily headed to the gymnasium.

As I made my way inside the gymnasium, I tried to to scan through the crowd for people who were wearing green T-shirts. It didn’t take me long to spot our team flocking in one corner of the gymn. And as I came nearer, I realized they were already practicing for our chant. So I just tried to fit myself in, and cheered along as much as I can.  

And then I saw you. Sitting on the bench. In green Deloitte T-shirt.  All nerdy and dorky and slim. You were inflating one of those green balloons for our props. And  for a nanosecond, the universe just seemed to stop. 

Here’s the thing: I’m pretty sure we all had the same design of the shirts, but I swear no one could have worn that Deloitte shirt better than you. In my eyes, you just stood out. Partly because it was the first time I saw your face then (I later on learned that you belong in another department which explains the unfamiliarity that surprised me), and partly because you simply looked… amazing. You didn’t look athletic at all in that shirt, because if anything, you rather look as feeble and clumsy and lame as I am in sports. I don’t know why, but you just looked especially amazing in my eyes then.

I tried to steal glances of you throughout the games. And in those fleeting moments, I slowly examined and familiarized the physical features that make you up. Your soft hair, your crooked smile, your small face, your eyes… your eyes that are just so sincere and soulful and kind. I was glad you didn’t catch me staring at you, because if you did, you probably would have stared back at me and our eyes would then lock with each other and you would have seen me melt and disintegrate into the most miniscule of pieces. It would have been embarrassment and elation all at once. Like fire and ice in a seamless dance.

The cosmos must have been conspiring for me as our team won overall first-runner up in the whole sportsfest. When our team leaders made us vote among several options as to how to spend up our cash prize, I was really hoping that the “group dinner” or “group movie date” will prevail. It meant I get to see you again. It meant I get to be with you again.

Meanwhile, as the weeks slowly dragged on, I found myself… well, stalking on you. Not really stalking. I mean, there was really not much to stalk in the first place since you kept your FB profile private. It seemed you didn’t have IG and Twitter account too so the least obvious thing I could do then was to add you in Lync. Hahaha. But what was there to stalk in Lync? Well, it was there where I discovered we have SIMILAR SIGN-OFF! Holly molly! This must really be fate teasing me!

And to add the cherry on top of the cake, you even added me up on Facebook not long after! I swear it was the third best feeling in the world next to passing the board exam and watching an Ed Sheeran concert! Gaaaaaaaah! Stoked as I was, I waited for several days before I accepted your friend request. I still couldn’t believe it! Considering that we only had 2 mutual friends then, were you, in any way, stalking me as well? (I couldn’t help but be swooned over the “assumed” gesture of you taking the time and effort to really search my profile in FB. Gosh, this is feeding my ego big time. Hahaha!)

I now had more valid, easy reasons to reach out to you. We were now friends in FB—I can now like your posts although you rarely post anything. We had the same sign-off—we both find this funny and weird and this eventually became our first topic in our Lync chat and FB chat, to see who the real Alpha is. Haha. We were also attending the same seminar organized by HR—I was stoked again to see your name in the list of attendees. Fate just loves teasing me! And finally, we were both anticipating our Green Team’s “movie date” (apparently, the movie option won the poll).

The movie. Our team decided to watch “Inside Out” in High Street. There were a handful of people I know from the Audit Department who were also in the Green Team so we decided to meet in the office. I was worried about you—since you were from another department and I didn’t know if you had a teammate who was coming along. So instinctively, I messaged you via Lync and asked whether you liked to come along with us to the cinema. You said no at first—you feared you’d be out of place. But after a few of minutes, you changed your mind and then said you’d be coming along. This made me jump a little from my seat, and made my heart skip a beat.

A friend of mine from Audit and I waited for you by the elevator, while the rest of my Audit friends were waiting in the lobby below. You said you had to change clothes first because you didn’t want to go to the cinema in corporate attire. I could have waited for you there as long as I need to, but my friend was already getting annoyed by how long it was taking you to fix yourself. But we waited still.

The cinema in High Street was only a few minutes’ walk away from the office. Which meant we had that entire span of time to talk to each other. You talked about your department and the things you do there while I talked about mine. I was surprised by how talkative you were, and was even more surprised by how comfortable it felt talking to you. If anything, it felt like we’ve known each other for years already. Or was it just me and my wishful thinking?

I remember buying fries and iced tea from Potato Corner while you helped yourself with some Tacos. I introduced you to more of my Audit friends while you simply responded with your nervous smile. I couldn’t help but grin with amusement. You were just so… cute.

As we shuffled our way inside the cinema, I couldn’t help but think who would be sitting next to whom. We chose the row with empty seats that could accommodate me, you, and three other friends of mine. We found just the perfect spot right at the third—or fourth, I couldn’t see clearly through the dark—row from the back. And for some reasons, things started to unfold smoothly from there: we ended up sitting next to each other. 

I wished the movie would not have ended. I wished the fries in my hands would not have emptied so you could still sneak your hand into the Potato Corner fries box I was holding, and so that our hands would touch—even accidentally, even for some infinitesimal segment of time. I wished we didn’t need to leave the cinema—I could have listened tirelessly to your commentaries about the movie no matter how trivial or funny or ironic or judgmental they were, and we could have exchanged opinions on how Pixar nailed it again this time, or how Joy and Sadness and Fear and Anger and Disgust could have changed the story differently. I wished… We could have… 

Now I wish I didn’t leave Deloitte so soon. I could have messaged your more through Lync and we could have attended more seminars together. I could have stolen more glances of you in the pantry during lunch, and we could have locked our eyes more while enjoying Mang Ed’s foods. I could have had the chance to see you again in our Christmas Party, or work with you in the firm’s future outreach programs. Or we could be in the same team again in next year’s sportsfest, and end up sitting next to each other again in the cinema for a new movie. I wish… I could have…

I know this may sound a little creepy but I want you to know that in that very first moment I laid eyes on you—in that gymnasium filled with people hungry to lord over the sportsfest— I instantaneously, undeniably, seriously had this huge crush on you.

And I still do.

The alpha between us,

HJC

A Sheerio's dream come true

So last March 12, 2015, I saw Ed Sheeran. I saw how his messy ginger hair crown his head. I saw him strum his guitars so passionately. I saw him perform on stage and sing from his core. And by the end of the night, I concluded that I just had the best two hours of my life.

How I came to know the ginger

So like any other Sheerio, I also have my own story about how I came to know Ed. It all started summer of 2012 when the first season of The Voice UK aired. The series caught my attention since two of my favorite British musicians, The Script lead vocalist Danny and the amazing Jessie J, were then serving as coaches in the show. That was it: the prime reason I watched the show was because of these two British music icons. There was no Ed in the picture yet. And as the show progressed, a contestant named Bill Downs became my bet to win the competition. Through YouTube, I watched his covers of various songs until I stumbled across his cover of a song called “U.N.I.” There and then, I fell in love with the song. I still had no idea then who the singer of the song was. After which, I immediately tried to search for that mysterious singer of “U.N.I.” And in today’s internet-fueled world, it didn't take me long to find him. My first encounter with Ed.

How I learned to love his music

When asked why I love Ed Sheeran so much, my instant response would be: “It’s because of his songs. Each is a story of their own. And for some unexplainable reason, I feel like they’re written for me.” 

From May 2012, I started following his career and how his music gradually engulfed the world. I remember tweeting endlessly about him and his music to the point where my classmates would nickname me as ‘Ed.’ I remember scouring every mall in Cagayan de Oro City for Ed’s “+” album, all to no avail. I remember spending my study-out sessions in different coffee shops in CDO while listening to his album over and over again. I remember celebrating Ed’s 23^rd birthday with my friend Benamor at Cham’s. I remember challenging my friend Kathleen Rae for a rap duel of “U.N.I.” I remember requesting my friend Jireh to do a cover of an Ed Sheeran song. I remember boasting Ed Sheeran to my friend Tisay. I remember entering Cogon’s National Book Store and hearing Lego House being played inside. I remember sleeping almost 3am in the morning from merely watching random videos of Ed Sheeran in YouTube.

How I made my way to MOA Arena

It was during our board exam review days when I learned that Ed would be visiting the Philippines on 2015 to hold a concert for his Multiply album tour. When it was announced that the selling date of the concert tickets would be on October 9, 2014, I became worried since I knew then that it fall within the second week our CPA Board Exam. But the Sheerio inside of me was in ablaze 

So last March 12, 2015, I saw Ed Sheeran. I saw how his messy ginger hair crown his head. I saw him strum his guitars so passionately. I saw him perform on stage and sing from his core. And by the end of the night, I concluded that I just had the best two hours of my life.

-tbc 

When Grey meets Tadhana

So yesterday was a roller-coaster of emotions and hormones and all physiological kind of outbursts you can imagine (don’t get the wrong idea. Haha) after I mustered the courage to watch back-to-back the controversial, substantially erotic, intense, and not to mention, overly censored “Fifty Shades of Grey” and the highly remarked, positively reviewed romantic indie film “That Thing Called Tadhana” with my housemates and friends. Indeed, my Valentines wasn’t as dull and as uneventful as I expected it to be – but if anything, I think my V-day was, how shall I put it, romantically fun and yes, sensually stimulating as Christian Grey and Anastasia Steele had the entire moviehouse tightly gripped to their seats while JM and Angelica had the crowd giggling for a good number of “hugot” lines which are truly “tagos sa puso.”

Been shaded Grey

“I don’t make love, I fuck… hard,” says the eccentric, super wealthy, dominating bachelor Christian Grey after reminding the submissive Anastasia Steele of the kind of mess she’s getting herself into. I won’t be a hypocrite and judge how much the movie did or didn’t measure up to the book. I tried reading the book myself the day (and even hours) before the movie but unfortunately made it only until Chapter 10. Hahahaha. Blame the demanding nature of my work for this significant time shortage. But anyways, I was with my friends Tessa and Kevin when we watched the movie, just making it on time to the moviehouse, after we swarmed our way through the crowd of couples and other groups of enthusiastic Grey fanatics.

The movie was well, uhm, highly erotic – poignantly erotic, to put it as beautifully as I can. Haha. Based on what I’ve read so far from the book, I kind of expected a different Christian Grey – a Sean O’pry type of guy, perfectly-sculpted and all, although the Anastasia I saw on the big screen was almost the girl I imagined her to be. Also, I was somehow disappointed with the acting skills of Grey during the earlier parts of the movie as he was just delivering his lines so lifelessly and without emotions although I could understand because that was just how his personality is described in the book. And the censored parts… well, I actually found it funny how those parts were patently censored (haha). And God knows how awkward it was for the couples who were then watching among the crowd. My movie buddies and I, for the mature people that we would like to think of ourselves to be (haha), were just there, in full agape to what was being laid out in front of our innocent eyes (haha).

The Dominant and the Submissive.. in the Red Room of Pain.. under a carefully fabricated contract.. with all the caressing, spanking, kissing, lovemaking, ropes, and whips… no doubt that it could well be taken as porn. However, as my friend Tessa (who has read the trilogy) and I would like to believe, the movie wasn’t totally as dirty and senseless as others have appraised it to be. True, it was full of physical intimacy, but the beautiful story that slowly buds out of the trilogy shouldn’t get buried under all the steaming erotic. For now, the first book offers us basically only the physical relationship of the characters but rest assured, it will get more kilig come the succeeding installments. For us non-readers, maybe we just have to wait how the story will develop, and not immediately jump on the conclusion that the movie was all about sex and sex alone. Grey and Anastasia definitely have more in store for us – in surely greater than fifty shades sexier and hotter.

Been pierced with Cupid’s arrow

On the other pole of the Earth – that’s how the sudden shift of paradigm has taken me aback – That Thing Called Tadhana offered an entirely different kind of feel, one that is simply light, sprinkled with just the right amount of humor and hugot-filled lines.

“Kung mahal mo, habulin mo, ipaglaban mo. ‘Wag mong hintaying may magtulak sa kanya pabalik sa’yo. Hilahin mo. Hanggang kaya mo, wag kang bibitaw. Sorry, mahal ko eh,” says a gravely broken-hearted Mace (Angelica Panganiban) as she randomly shares her story to a stranger Anthony (JM De Guzman).

- to be cont. haha *busy